It is done!

Hallelujah! lolcat-invisible-high-five

Bossman was really sweet and after asking if I was serious, he said “You got me through a very tough time and I’m so grateful for that.” He said he knew sooner or later that it was coming (was hoping later, not surprised at sooner).

There was no letting myself off the hook – I’d already gone too long and it was only getting scarier so now or never. Plus, I DO NOT want to feel the smack of the Uni on my head because that sucks like you cannot believe.

My coach told me I was as shut down as she’s ever seen me and I know that’s true. The corporate world takes it out of me – it doesn’t happen to everyone but it sure does to me. The decision came down to whether I would CHOOSE to “shine bright like a diamond” or not. And I chose to shine.

“Find light in the beautiful sea
I choose to be happy
You and I, you and I
We’re like diamonds in the sky”

Thank you all again (seen and unseen readers) who have carried me along, cheerleading all the way. Couldn’t have done it without you!

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Send me good vibes!

soldier_squirrelTomorrow (Tuesday) is D-DAY and I’ve got to do this. It’s gotten so far out of control in my head that it’s this big monster now! It won’t be half as bad as I’m imagining it.

So, send me good vibes, energy, love, confetti, pictures of Cookie’s arm porn, whatever you have – send it. And look for my next post giving all the gory details.

Over and out

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Hippy Birdy Two Ewes!

sekrit BF

Biggie ups to The Gal for this wondermus little graphic that I showed to damn near everyone today! Thank you, Gal – THIS is the kind of thing that makes my heart happy!

Yes, it is my birthday and it was a lovely day filled with cards, wishes from co-workers, cake (MMM!) and Kohl’s cash! (I bought myself a little something.)

I also had quite possibly *the worst* pad thai I’ve ever had. It was inedible. Just heinous. (Lunch bought by nice bossman – what a bummer) Then, Duty and I went to dinner and I had (again, quite possibly) *the most* medegana lasagna I’ve ever had. It was gross. My grandmother is rolling in her grave – I wouldn’t be surprised if they used cottage cheese instead of ricotta! I didn’t eat but three bites of it and said “nope … not eating it” (like I did with heinous pad thai). Today was a blargy food day but a happy cake day so it’s all good.

Speaking of thank yous – I really want you guys to know (Kwiz, Cousin O’Love, Gal and Jody) how much your words have helped me this week. The support has been awesome and I love you all for it.

I’ll get there. As Cousin O’Love said “Just do it.”

(And Jody, I will tell my boss those things. I think the world of him. And I think the world of me too so I best get moving, yo!)

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I’m a chicken-ass

No, I haven’t given my notice yet.

Yes, I’m a big chicken despite all my bluster here. Inside me resolutely resides a girl who almost cannot bear to disappoint her really nice boss.

Isn’t that sad?

I know I have to do this. I know I have to go in and give notice – not because we’re moving to Germany (which we’re not) or some other Hail Mary pass excuse – but because I stake a claim for myself.

Thing is: it’s not that big of a deal. People give notice all the damn time. And as soon as I do it, doors will open, I’ll breathe easier and things will be 100% better.

And yet.

Here I sit. Rooted to this couch, running the conversation over and over and over in my head.

Why is this so damn hard?

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Farting around is not an income-producing activity

Did you know that? I’m learning it.

I’ve been doing a lot of farting around lately and my income shows it.

get stuff doneI’ve only part way written my copy for the Certification course (gotta blend levels 1 and 2 into one program), rename the Divinely Guided Biz Makeover and re-tool the description, finish my opt-in, have the bare-bones of my mastermind program done …. Jeez. I suck. I have like 100 excuses for why but that’s all they are. Excuses.

Anyway, we are officially finished the wedding season with two on Duty’s side and one on mine. Now we move into baby season with two on my side (Cousin O’Cool apparently only produces boyz so that’s what’s coming!) and none (yet) on Duty’s side. I do so loves me some babies so long as they ain’t mine.

There was a time when I was sad that I didn’t have a child but that faded fast and I realized how much I love and need my freedom. I chafe under any kind of restriction and we all know raising a child is all about restriction. But love. They’re about love, too. I get lots of that from Luke and Peter and Christine (Niece of Artsy-Fartsy). I am totes awash in the lurve.

Countdown to leaving YOPOE has started. Woot! (And then I must catapult myself back into the life of an entrepreneur!)

Anyway, I’m here. Farting around, counting days, doing bitty stuff here and there, playing lots of Cookie Jam (and that could be construed as some naughty love game me and sekrit BF are playing but it’s not (dammit!)) and did I mention counting days? Yep, lots of that.

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Letters I’ll never send – Part two

shareasimage (4)In part two of a semi-recurring series on Letters I’ll never send, I submit the following entries:

Dear Men who come into the lobby for an appointment,
Be like the women who come in. State your name, who you are here to see and then sit your ass down. Don’t be trying to walk into conference rooms where others are already meeting. Don’t pace around the lobby area, talk loudly on your phone, or demand I make copies of shit for you. Come in, announce yourself and sit the fuck down. Jesus. I just cannot with you morons. Love, she who really, really isn’t cut out to be a receptionist.

Dear person who seems to thinks they can pick my brain for biz advice despite not giving one shit about me, my life or my business,
Just go away, already. How much of a narcissist can you possibly be? I’m not your mom or your cheerleader. I’d say something to you about it but I just don’t care enough to do that. I’d like you to just go away. Signed, she who wants to hit you with a fly swatter.

Dear Neighbor Greg, please please please hack up a lung on the other side of your porch. It is just plain gross listening to that first thing in the morning as I’m drinking my coffee. As a highly clairaudient person, even the slightest retching sound seeps into my pores and makes me feel like barfing and that’s not how I like to start my day. You’re getting too old to drink and smoke like you’re 19, dude, and your body is trying to tell you that. Signed, she who acknowledges her own aches and pains are telling her something to which she is not listening either.

Sweetness and Light, that’s me.

Happy news! Cousin O’Cool found herself unexpectedly (and happily) pregnant so Luke and godson Peter are going to be big brothers! Fingers crossed for a girl this time. :) More behbeys for me to hold and love! Wheee! And Cousin O’Love is going to be a grandmother! (These two events are happening at around the same time – babies everywhere! Woot!) I can’t wait to hold them all. (the babies, not the cousins)

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Still here, yo

Yes, I am still here.

I’ve tried to write 3 posts in the last week and have abandoned each in turn for unknown reasons. Mostly, though, I have much to say and not enough words to say it – or not enough of the RIGHT words to say it.

I loved my trip to Utah, land of magnificent tubs and real turkey sandwiches, my wonderful coach Angella and all the ladies who come to these masterminds, willing to do what it takes to grow their business but more importantly, grow themselves in the process. It’s such a change from the energy at YOPOE and it’s really a nice place for me to be.

I came back desperately wanting to end the day job by October 1st and thinking I had dropped enough hints to Duty that it wouldn’t shock him out of his skin. Let it be known that when you’re married to a WYSIWYG kind of guy, hints don’t work. You’d think I’d know this, being married to him for almost 14 years, right?


bombAs the Gap Band sang “Girl, you dropped a bomb on me” and I think it sent him off to another planet. All I said was “I can’t stay there any more. I have to leave.” and that went over about as well as you can imagine. He said I was going back on my promise to YOPOE, to my promise to Duty (which, no, because we agreed to talk about it in October and it’s almost October), etc. etc.

There was enormous tension in the house and the Universe didn’t open the door for me to have to “I’m leaving” convo with the bossman. Tuesday, Duty and I had a heart to heart (which he initiated, to his credit) and even though it was hard for me to say (again) “This is what I have to do”, he listened. We agreed that I’d put notice in so that Oct 31 is my last day.

I’m okay with that.

In the meantime, I have SO SO SO much to do for PI and feel like I am just running around in circles. And most days at YOPOE it’s quiet as hell and of course, I can’t do anything much there. Bleah.

(Pulls out calendar and starts marking off the days.)

So yeah. Here.

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The One & Only SnarkyPants

Boring the hell out of youse people since 2002.

My sekrit boyfriend


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