As Cher sings: “If I could turn back time …” and I respond “I’d get those damn braces my mom wanted me to get.” OY!
Went to the dentist last week to take advantage of their offer to donate the entire fee of teeth whitening to Relay for Life. So far, so good. Think I will go back for a checkup since I haven’t had one in several years. Nice dentist takes x-rays and all kinds of things and then delivers some sobering news: an extraction or two, a root canal and crown, re-do some fillings, lots of gum work to address and finally, how about a bridge or two? Fuckety. I hate dental work. Hate it.
Backstory on why all this is needed: Somewhere in my childhood, I had an accident while attempting to ride a bike without holding on to the handlebars. Messed up my teeth somehow. Fast forward to early teens where it’s determined I need braces – and the big time braces (head gear, night gear, the whole schmear. Yes, every adolescent’s nightmare.) Mother goes to lots of trouble to take me for all the preliminary work. Bless her. Memory is very foggy but I seem to recall that this was taking place at a time when my dad’s health was really bad and my mom was under a lot of stress. I remember that she asked me what I wanted to do and of course, I said PASS on the braces. She didn’t make me, mostly because she had a thousand other things going on. I don’t blame her one single bit. This is all on me.
Fast forward to adult life – teeth are a mess. And getting progressively more of a mess as I get older. Jaw is all out of alignment and I have the overbite from hell. I ask nice dentist: Is all this a result of my not getting braces? He confirms what I know anyway. Yep. It is.
Moral of the story: Never give your child the choice because they just might be a dumbass like me and pay for it later.
Expect lots of whining from me the rest of the year as I start the fun process of getting this straightened out. (Ha! No pun intended.) Although, on the bright side: nitrous oxide – oh! How I love you! We shall become good friends this year.