(Editor’s note: I started this story last week so I may as well finish it. Medical update: I’m alive and at about 70% of normal.)
So, who’s sick of my whining? Come on, raise your hand. I see you over there in the corner (Godmother) saying “Ugh. Just shut up already. Damn, girl! Write about something else.”
Okay, so without futher delay (swigs some cough syrup), I give you
Drama in real life (or “Duty steps up at the Dunkins”)
Date: Thursday a week ago
Place: Dunkins at Fairfax Circle
Characters: Me, Duty, a man of God and lots of other dopes standing in line for coffee and donuts and one shall we say “interesting” character
So, we’re all standing in a LONG line (Maria, come back soon!) and I’m busy trying not to cough on everyone when a strange presence enters in the form of a skeevy dude. He cut through the line and went to the bathroom. Not so bizarre yet because there are all kinds of characters lurking about DD at any time of day. When he came out (mind you, he didn’t purchase anything or get in line) he started ranting to the poor man of God in line about the Catholic church and how despicable they are. Now, two things: 1. We don’t even know for sure this MoG was a priest and 2. so what if he was? This was NOT the venue for loudly proclaiming your feelings about the church and its myriad issues. The MoG just kept quiet and looked at the floor a lot. Duty, bless his heart, told Skeevy Dude (SD) to just move on, that no one wanted to hear his rantings. He said it repeatedly and finally SD took his skeevyass self and left. I watched him get into his car (noting that he parked in the handicapped spot and neither displayed a tag for that nor seemed handicapped (unless you count his proclivity for shouting inappropriate things in a Dunkin Donuts) and drive off. And that was fun, right?
Oh! But it gets better! Guess who makes a return appearance?
Uh huh. SD comes back in and starts ranting about “If you don’t like the show, turn the channel” at Duty. (WTF??) And Duty steps right up into SDs face and tells him to get out of here now . (Way to go, D-man!) SD says “Eww, your breath stinks really bad” and Duty replies (as he’s all up in SD’s grill) “Good! I have the flu and I hope you get it.” hahahahahhahahhahahahahah That was fucking awesome!!! SD withered like a non-watered plant and took his skeevyass self out and got back in his car (again parked in the handicapped spot) and left for good this time.
I said to the chick in front of me “I thought he left before” and she said “He did. And then he came back!” We laughed about how inane that was. I was very proud of the Dman for stepping up like that but even more proud that when the time came for a snarky comment, he was ready! Clearly my influence is showing.
Anyway, I am alive and making my way back to normalcy. This thing really got me down, y’all. I don’t like being sick (who does, I know) and it just took away my joy (even in woo-woo stuff) and energy. Let’s not do this again, okay?