I went back to look at my previous Valentine’s Day posts from over the years, got to the one about Lauren in 2006 , got all tearful and stopped there. She was always a joy to be around, from a child right up through her young adulthood. Some of my funniest memories are of goofy things she and I did. For example, back in 2000, I took her to a lecture by one of my favorite authors, Anne Lamott. We went to dinner at an Italian restaurant beforehand and happened upon some most excellent butter. (or “buttahs” as we called them. La and I were aficionados of exquisite buttah!) We decided, for reasons that have now escaped me, to save some of this buttah to take home. Which made no sense because we had to go sit in an auditorium for a couple hours first. La was the keeper of the goodies and she put them in her inside (yes, against her body) coat pocket and off we went. About halfway through the lecture, she nudges me and opens her coat to show a big spot of greasy butter. MMMM, right?? hahah We both laughed at our stupidity for this plan and made a mental note of the name of the buttah so we could go in search of it another time. (Lordy Lordy, we were not the brightest bulbs sometimes!)
So, remember that my unconditional love carries as its price tag not only the desire to do stupid shit, but the WILLINGNESS to carry it out. Let that be a warning to the teeming masses who are, as I write these words, lining up to gain my love and stuff.
(The first person in line who mentions ginger cookies, the amount of hair on their body and various ways to remove it, and the joys of Schlitz beer in one conversation wins the prize. Of course, no telling what the prize is. hahahahah)
Happy Valentine’s day to all my 6,329 readers (a girl can dream, right?) and sending you all warm thoughts and a big hug.
What about calling a few different Starbucks to find out if they still had pumpkin spice lattes and then inquiring WHERE the stuff goes since it just all the sudden DISAPPEARS RIGHT WHEN WE JUST GOT USED TO IT BRINGING US BACK TO A HAPPY PLACE!, making sunshine and people shaped cookies WHILE wearing a spring loaded santa hat, and really BELIEVING that if we split the bag of chips it didn’t count! Does that win any prizes??? :P
I like prizes almost as much as I like cake… and that’s A LOT of like!