A fond(ish) farewell

Just heard from Neighbor Greg that (former) roommate Greg passed away yesterday after a very long battle with end stage renal failure.

Who’s Roommate Greg? Let me give you the backstory taken from a post I made in the thick of things:

Sooooo – did I mention the RG debacle yet? Anyone want to hear my tale of woe? Okay kids, here we go:

Chapter 1

RG is Neighbor Greg’s friend who has been staying with us since October because the farm where he was living was sold and he couldn’t stay where he was until the sale settled and a bunch of other crap I don’t really understand or care about. He does not have a license because he got three (3) DUIs so he doesn’t drive (i.e. he has to be carted around everywhere). In addition, he has end stage renal failure (i.e. his kidneys crapped out big time) so he goes to dialysis 3x a week. In other words, a guy really down on his luck. Pair that with two very compassionate hearts and you’ve got 6 months of supporting someone. That’s okay because we’ve been fortunate to have enough to do that and why not, right?

Chapter 2
Back in December, we found out that RG had “borrowed” our car in the middle of the night. He drove it to Annapolis to bring money to his ex-wife. Mind, this is a guy who gets a total of $600 disability a month and she’s calling him begging for money. And he risks his (whatever) to take it to her. He’s not savvy in the ways of the computer and didn’t realize that we can see the toll charges and busted him. Duty made him SWEAR that he would never do that again. Case closed, right? No, not so much.

Chapter 3
Last Sunday, Duty, PiK and I went to a hockey game. It was snowing like a big dog and I was glad Duty was driving because I sure as hell didn’t want to. RG found out the previous Friday that his access ports for dialysis are now very limited and unless he gets a kidney transplant within 4-5 years, he’s done for. Not happy news, this I understand. However, making a choice to DRINK when you are feeling depressed and then “borrow” a car that’s not yours to drive in bad, snowy conditions to take money (guess where??) is really anathema to me. And I bet you can guess what happened. We get in the car on the way home from the game and RG calls. I hear Duty say “We’ll talk about this when we get home” and hang up the phone. Oh lordy, this cannot be good. Duty fumes the entire way back. I put my shields up because it ain’t gonna be pretty.

Chapter 4
Upon arriving home, we see our car with some lovely damage to the front driver’s side. Perfect. As we walk in the door, RG starts to explain and Duty just says “Two weeks, Greg. You’re outta here in two weeks”. RG runs after him, yipping like a little doggie offering more explanation but Duty just cuts him off. Guess who unloads on RG? Yep, Miss “Love and Light” herself – ME. I let him have it with both barrels. I guess I don’t have an alcoholic mindset or addictions that would compel me to make such bad choices but I cannot, for the fucking life of me, understand how stealing a car in the snow to take money to some idiot is a reasonable (let alone, good) choice. I told him that he brought all this on himself and he will sink or swim on his own merits. And yes, he had to leave. Duty had to make me go in the other room because I was allllll pissed off. I mean, this is what you do to people who have opened their hearts to you? GAH.

Chapter 5
So, damage to our car? $2000. Damage to other dude’s car: $2000. That means that we are not coughing up $4000 we don’t have to pay for this. Duty had to report it to the police that RG took the car without permission so that we could get insurance to pay for it. Which means RG will be served with some papers and he has to go to court. Possible repercussions? On the really bad side for him? Jail. On the less bad side for him? Paying the insurance company back the $4000 and no chance of getting his license back. How he will pay insurance back $4000 when he gets $600 to live on is beyond me. But we will see what the judge says. We don’t want to see him in jail, yet that may be the slap he needs to get his shit together (although I doubt it, seeing his propensity to fuck up his own life).

Chapter 6
Although he can get back to his place on the farm soon, he may be staying in a shelter in the interim. He leaves a week from today and it’s time (actually, it’s way past time and this is the price Duty and I pay for not making him move sooner). Duty and I feel like crap about how all this went down. And it made me so thankful for the fact that I make decent decisions and not ones that hurt me more than help.
———————-
So yeah, that was Roommate Greg – nice guy who made ghastly decisions with his life. For the record, he worked off the money he owed us for the deductible on the car. He also put up shelves in my bedroom for all my books and little knickknacks, hung the (really heavy) mirror that my dad gave my mom for a present right after I was born and painted the bathroom a lovely shade of Lauren yellow. He also reorganized the garage and built shelves and a container for birdfood.

What made me saddest about hearing the news of his death was that last we talked to him, he was excited because he was working in the dialysis unit because he knew so much about how to do it. I can only imagine how difficult it must be to feel worthless and I know he felt that way often because he told me that. So to hear that he was finally able to contribute in some way made me happy for him.

So, peace out, Roommate Greg. I won’t forget your gory war stories as I was trying to read, your love for Tivo and endless repeats of JAG, Stauffers Mac & Cheese, and the way you always called LucieCat “Herm” (we never did figure that out). I’m glad you are out of pain and hope things are better for you now.