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Ick Ick Ick – Day Six

November 8, 2010 Written by Lisa

Listen, I could write about 700 things I hope I never have to do for this question. You expect me to pick just one? Are you mad? Well? Are you? I’m going to list five because I can. (I also run with scissors occasionally.)

Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.

5) I hope I never have to participate in a triathlon because that would mean crossing the finish line in a coffin. Which is to say, I am not at all athletic.

4) I hope I never have to forage in dumpsters for food. I have a finely attuned sense of smell and that would be more overwhelming to me than walking blindfolded through a mall.

3) I hope I never have to wear diapers. I think we can all relate, yes?

2) I hope I never have to be a waitress. Like Gal, I have neither the temperament nor the poker face necessary for such a job. I’d be poorer than poor and I’d have to up my meds.

and finally:

1) I hope I never have to work as one of those people who picks up dead animals by the side of the road. I have to close my eyes while driving past them (okay, it’s just one eye) because I cannot deal with hurt/wounded/dead animals. I’d be less spazzed out by a dead human body by the side of the road than an animal. And this is just one reason why I don’t help clean up the road of trash and whatnot. I am terrified of seeing half-gnawed-on animal parts. (We have huge turkey vultures here who pounce on whatever they can and I know their leftovers will be plentiful.)

Surely you out there have ONE thing you hope never to do, yes? Go on then. Spill it.

30 Days of Honesty, Suckage
If wishes were fishes …
Ten guesses on this one, folks

1 Comment

  1. Jody Jody
    November 8, 2010    

    I hope I never have to bury one of my children. Gulp.

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