Oh hai. Here I am, once again in the throes of a “just don’t give a shit” kind of mood.
(As an aside, I see more idiots spell the word “throws” than “throes” which only tells me they don’t read. It makes me want to cry.)
But I digress.
Yes, yes I do digress. Oh lord how I digress.
Here are some things I care about:
1. David Cook
2. “teh woo-woo”
3. how fat I’m getting on a daily basis
4. the tomato plants in my garden
5. my godson and his brother
6. the relative health (or lack thereof) my pets
7. Duty (yes, he’s listed after Cookie but don’t take that to mean much anything.)
Here’s what I don’t care about:
Pretty much everything else
Really.
Subject to change, of course.
But for now, I’m having trouble rallying up anything to get excited about.
Might these be my very own “dog days of summer”? I wonder if working with very rich people who take mega vacations every five seconds is part of it.
Thing is, there’s not one thing I want that I don’t have or can’t get, generally speaking. I live a blessed life and I so appreciate that even though it sounds like I don’t.
I’m not even a materialistic kind of chick. Give me an iPad and wireless and I’m quite content.
So, what is it I really want. (whispers: FREEDOM)
I feel trapped again and I’ve done it to myself. I gave up.
(Crawls back into hole)
A story I think about often:
One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people. He said, “My son, the battle is between two “wolves” inside us all.
One is Evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.
The other Is Good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.”
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: “Which wolf wins?”
The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.” – Author Unknown
Remember to feed your joy!
It’s no accident that the phrase is, “crazy from the heat” and not “crazy from a frigid wind-chill factor.” This weather saps me and leaves me grumpy, whereas cold and snow make me feel invigorated, like the proud pioneer woman I am most decidedly not. So don’t be too hard on yourself. You might just be suffering heat-induced malaise, as well.
Though your photo choice and last few sentences are very powerful. I know you’re speaking from your soul, and I know you will get yourself through this. I predict that knowing what you want, longing for it and envisioning it, will pull you through!