“What goes up must come down
Spinnin’ wheel, got to go round
Talkin’ ’bout your troubles, it’s a cryin’ sin
Ride a painted pony, let the spinnin’ wheel spin” – Blood, Sweat and Tears
So yeah. Remember how awesome last week was? Filled with cakes, COOKies and all kinds of specialness?
This week, the pendulum has swung back to middle ground once again. It’s okay, I suppose. I can’t live in that bubble of awesomeness forever (can I?)
Just today I was feeling like I want to run away. So I asked myself: “Self, what are you running away from?”
Good questions I ask myself.
The answer came: I don’t like what’s in front of me.
And what might that be?
A huge to-do list that I am not excited about doing.
Well, might could be excited if I had someplace to work that was more conducive than my f’ing couch with work squished in while dogs sleep. I’m hella annoyed that I don’t have a good place to do this creative work I need to do.
Could I create one? Yes. Well, a better one. No my ideal one, alas.
Feh.
Also, I have to roll out my Level 2 Certification course and I don’t have any idea on pricing for it. I’ll have to just pick something that feels right and put it out there. I tend to price things too low and then get pissed when I put in a lot of time for not a lot of remuneration.
Part of this malaise is due to my co-worker’s 3 week absence. She’s one of two reasons I’m there and when she’s not, I get all “What’s the damn point of this work?” and mopey. Like I said, I know being there 3 days a week balances and helps me. I get too spacey left on my own for long. Still, I just don’t care about any of it and it’s hard to rally up enthusiasm for it. (#firstworldproblems I know)
Geez, this is turning into a whine-fest. Sorry ’bout that.
Okay, off to be productive.
Sometimes it’s hard to live in the moment when you don’t *like* the moment.