Well, that was unexpected!

So, Thursday I woke up with this weird tingly numbness on the left side of my face.  Almost like novocaine was wearing off.  Thinking I slept wrong or something, I ignored it.  (As  I often do with physical stuff because eww.)

When it didn’t magically go away, I looked it up online.  Yeah. Don’t do that, kids. No good will come of it.  I diagnosed myself with a small stroke, possible brain cancer, and Bell’s palsy.  Back to ignoring.

11am came and I decided that perhaps this was a signal I should take more seriously and called the doctor’s office.  They told me that since I hadn’t gotten the bloodwork done when it was requested (August 2013!), they didn’t have anything to go on and recommended that I go to the ER.

I tried (in vain, I might add) to talk them out of that, recalling the abject horror I experience every time I’ve had to go to the ER with Duty.

There are people vomiting everywhere!  In the lobby (go your ass into the bathroom if you know that’s a possibility) and in the bays inside the ER itself (okay, can’t argue with that but still, gross!).

This little clairaudient with super sonic hearing cannot abide the sounds of barfing.  It makes me want to flee and when you’re the patient, fleeing is not encouraged.

Fine, I’ll go to the ER then. Dammit.  Call Duty and ask him to come home from work to take me. (I hate asking for things.)  Of course, he does.  We go this time to an ER recently built on this side of the bridge rather than trek back into Annapolis.  It’s a calm, serene place where there’s (amazingly enough!) no one in the waiting room (therefore, no one barfing) and I am taken inside quickly.

Nurses shuffle around taking blood pressure, temps and all other ER things.  Duty and I laugh about how this is weird – usually he’s the one on the bed and I’m sitting on a chair (trying not to hear aforementioned barfing sounds).  

Finally (after a 30 minute wait), the nice doctor comes in, hears my story of weird facial numbness, mentions it could be a TIA (A transient ischemic attack (TIA) is an event, sometimes called a mini-stroke, with stroke symptoms that last less than 24 hours before disappearing.)

Farts.

That is not good.

Numbness has worn off by this time (also an indicator of a TIA) and we are released from the hospital with an appointment to see my regular doctor the next day for more tests and a referral for the lovely MRI.

As an aside: Don’t post illness stuff on Facebook, lest you get a zillion messages from people worried you are dying.  Even when  you try to add humor, it just makes it worse.  I won’t be doing this again, ever.  If you love me, you’ll know I’ve shuffled off when you hear it from Duty.  (Or if you don’t love me and just read Snarkypants for shits and giggles, when I never post here again.)

Long story short(er): Doc is pretty sure it’s the TIA thing and sets me up with MRI and some carotid artery ultrasounds, bloodwork and all kinds of medical shit I really am not excited about.  But, better than being paralyzed on one side of my body with foggy brain issues as that would seriously impact the work I am here to do in this lifetime and am only now getting around to doing.

No further symptoms have shown up and I feel okay.

Can I say that this is a huge pisser? After the amazing high of coming back from Utah, making strides in my PI work, feeling all forceful and directed for the almost first time in my damn life, then this happens?

Fuckety.

I am, however, not a dumbass and am taking this as a sign to pay a-bloody-ttention to my damn body.

Spoke with my favorite medical intuitive and he’s recommended a few things which, of course, I am doing.  He didn’t see a cause for huge alarm and I need to let him know what the MRI and other scans/bloodwork find.

Onward.  At least the Angels took good care of me, ensuring the ER had no random barfing incidents.  For that (and so many other things) I am profoundly grateful.

(Thanks to Gorky, Gal, Julie and Jennifer for sending love, support and sweetness!)