Because now you are all spoiled with me posting a hundred times a day, right?
Fine. I hear the clamour for more! more! more! of my wit and wisdom from the crowd and so I shall oblige. {/delusions of grandeur}
What are you an expert on? Is it because of training, lived experience, or both?
Here’s what I have a stellar grasp on: David Cook (ha! I wish!), Woo, sitting on my ass, writing, sitting on my ass writing, and surfing Facebook. All hail the Queen.
Has a teacher ever changed your life? How so?
The one that I remember best is this tiny woman who taught remedial English in college. What was yours truly doing in remedial English?
Well, yours truly farted around like a big dog in Advanced Placement English in her freshman semester of college and had to go back and start from the beginning. Good thing, too, because what I didn’t get from my twelve years of Catholic education, I got from this woman. She used to stand on a chair and talk to the basketball players as if they were children sometimes. She was an awesome teacher and for the life of me, I can’t remember her name but damned if I can remember my second grade teacher’s name (Miss Mountain). Weird, eh?
Are there any household chores you secretly enjoy? Which ones — and why?
I like vacuuming and laundry and I do those both, happily. Cleaning the kitchen makes me want to kill myself.
How do you reign in self-critical voices?
I asked myself a while ago if I would say those very same things to Lauren in that same tone of voice I used on myself. “NEVER!” came my response. And so, I taught myself to be kinder by asking that question every. single. time I started jumping in my own shit. It cured me fast.
If you could custom blend a perfume or cologne, what would it include?
I am generally fond of warm, spicy sniffs (like Opium perfume) so it would most likely be that.
What does FEAR feel like, in your body?
It feels like me running to the bathroom at top speed because everything in my body decides it’s time to evacuate NOW. Also, I get clammy and jittery.
Do you think you’re currently operating at 100% capacity?
hahahahahahhahahahah (catches breath) hahahahahahahah
What do you value most: free time, recognition, or money?
Oh, gosh. It’s not recognition and if you have money, you likely would have a lot of free time, so let’s say money and leave it at that.
I love Opium, too! My mother and kid sister used to make fun of me for it, likening it to something they’d use in their yards to discourage bugs. You make me feel validated.